big suprise-not

so the thirteen-year-old will NOT be going to the relatives for Christmas. the case worker swore up and down and backwards to me and and to her, and now it's not happening- i feel really bad for her :(
so now i have to go shopping today- in the MADNESS....
and when bubbles comes back into care we will not be able to take her (because of ratios). but i feel ok about this- i had a dream last night and I just knew we wouldn't be taking her.

we have fielded so many phone calls and appointments for this last placement , it is unbelievable! i am EXHAUSTED from talking to other grownups about every aspect of our lives. Doing foster care ls like being under a big fat microscope 24/7. It is so wearing... i am feeling bummed out from all this and the holiday rush and my kids are being pains in the - seriously! what is with them lately?

right now i am almost positive i don't want to take another placement again.

- and Sweepea had a visit with Grama and I talked with CW. she said she had no IDEA where the homestudy is .. mediation is the 6th, court the 12th. i know and she knows her head will roll if the homestudy is not completed by court. the judge EXPEDITED it for crying out loud!!