Sunday, March 13, 2011

she speaks volumes

for how a fundamentalist-homebirther thinks. it is a term i think very suited to those woman who have such rigid ideologies in regards to birth that they can not even consider any view other than their own.

from this thread i started on MDC. the first 10 pages had some real discussion, but on page 11 it falls apart thanks to people like this....
Originally Posted by littlest birds




Thank God my midwives practiced outside the law. That's the only way there was and that has been a common issue throughout the history of modern homebirth. Nobody made you do anything illegal, and I can't imagine a woman walking into homebirth without finding out its status in her area and then blaming the midwife for not mentioning it. Passive consumers are better served in the hospital IMO. I think it's rather a shame that homebirth became so trendy. People who don't really intend to face the risks of these types of attendants are doing so anyway, and then complaining about the differences. I wish hospitals were friendlier to women's birthing bodies and less frightening. They could then attract more of the women who aren't served well by homebirth. If the homebirth community, which is already learning all the time, and responding and changing over time, is inadequate FOR YOU then why not just take yourself another direction? And if you're not an informed consumer, it's probably the midwives who should be running away from you.


I think the shame is that women often lose their autonomy in the hospital experience, and so many turn to homebirth to be safe from that. They may not want the whole package of outsider health care. I do want the whole package. Unfortunately it seems mostly to be all or nothing. The only women who get real in-between choices are those in the lower-risk categories. And as many of us know, you can slip from low-risk to high-risk quite suddenly, so you can't even breathe easy about being low risk. Others are forced to choose between options such as automatic repeat c-section or "illegal" birth. So it is easy to see why women who don't really like the entire risk package choose homebirths. It's also easy to see how trained we are to be passive. Even here it has been said over and over that it is the attendant's responsibility if the mother is not informed. If you want your midwife to take on the level of responsibility of a physician, then you shouldn't choose a CPM homebirth. The qualifications for CPM midwives are so much different that I can hardly understand how people are surprised that the potential for error is also different.


Losing your baby, whatever your story, does not give you the right to propose to regulate away my birth options and freedoms. You need to be reforming maternity care inside the system if you want the built-in perks of that system. While I know that is much more difficult to change, I'd prefer that my outside options stay outside that system. I never claimed I was legal or low risk or anything like that and neither did my midwives. If you are getting into having a homebirth, you really do need to know what you are getting into. You really do need to inform yourself. You are stepping outside of the system. You really are taking some extra risks. I am shocked that anyone choosing homebirth isn't aware of that.


I didn't see who thought the CPM license shouldn't even exist. Why is anyone attacking their very existence? How awful! My understanding is that the CPM is the new version of the old fashioned lay midwife who learned almost everything as an apprentice and could have plenty of gaps and weaknesses in her training and professional conduct. Now with the current licensing, this community is a lot better than it was, and because it is so much better and the other choices so few, all kinds of women are flocking to them. Some lay midwives have always been more expert than others, some better than docs and some worse and some not much better than the grandma next door. And they are constantly pointed at throughout modern history as in need of external control ever since the clean and hyper-controlled, well-equipped version of institutional care came into being. There have been many many attempts at such control, and I think internal regulation by other midwives is absolutely the best. Anything else and there ain't no "homebirth community" to question. For those who don't think there should be any CPMs, why not just choose not to use one yourself and leave other people's choices to them to be made freely? I am really offended that anyone at MDC would say my preferred birthing option shouldn't even exist. I feel deeply disrespected by such statements. I am extremely upset that this forum is used as a place for people to say that the entire homebirth community is the problem.






so i said..........
seriously?

like so , let me get this strait..

if someone joins into the 'trendy" homebirth clique and there baby dies, and then they say, "hey guys..lets have an honest discussion about what could be changed to help make this safer/better for woman" then what? how dare they suggest such a thing?!..obviously they are hip enough for homebirth....

sigh

do i get any bonus points on your coolness scale since everyone of my babies up until my 6 month old was born into the hands of a midwife? if i count correctly , that means i have been delivered by midwives more times than you. but, maybe , my daughter dying was just proof i was not "cool enough".




and , hey i have another question for "littlest bird"
do you use a licensed dentist? electrician? mortgage broker? do you routinely in your life settle for substandard, unlicensed care, or only when it comes to you baby's life?

11 comments:

The Non-Monogamist said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Non-Monogamist said...

They can kiss my ass!

Sheila said...

It's a shame that person has to feel that way. Definitely shows she doesn't quite understand the seriousness of the issue that she is "fighting" for. I only have one baby, born Nov. 09, and he was born in the hospital. I honestly thought it was a great experience - they read my birth plan, they really listened to me, and it was a good overall experience. I'm not going to get all caught up on the fact that "oh no, I had to have an IV in my arm, boo hoo." I understand why they do the things they do, but they also know I was really wanting to go as "natural" as possible.

Sasha said...

as a side note I have actually talked to people that refuse to use a licenced dentist and prefer to go to "underground" dentist that fly in the face of the tyrannical dentist association.
...
no, I am not kidding.

ccc said...

""If you want your midwife to take on the level of responsibility of a physician, then you shouldn't choose a CPM homebirth.""


It should not matter that one is a physician or midwife. Either one is just as responsible for those under their care. No matter who a woman seeks for her prenatal/birth she is under that person's care and is usually paying for it also.

When a dr. or midwife takes someone on as a patient the relationship changes to caregiver and patient. The patient trusts the caregiver has the skills that they have proclaimed and will look out for their best interests.

This is what I always sought after with my lay midwives and with my doctor. This is what I believe Liz was doing with her births also. Yes, the skills between a dr and midwife can be different. But, they can be different between two drs and two different midwives also. But, one trusts that the dr or midwife would refer treatment elsewhere or with someone different if the situation went out of their scope of skills.

I have had midwives tell me that a situation/s was out of their expertise. I have also had a midwife tell me they would try something they had never done before with me(a breech birth). But, they were up front and honest.
They were looking out for me as their patient.

""And if you're not an informed consumer, it's probably the midwives who should be running away from you. ""

The midwives are out there selling a service. Anyone who sells a service convinces us that we need it. The midwife does the informing. Then, we make an informed decision based on her information. How can you be informed first before talking to a midwife? How can you be informed first before she shows her credentials? But, really, if we are supposed to be informed and know it all--we would not depend on the knowledge of a midwife/dr. We go to them because we are not knowledgeable about every aspect of childbirth. And, when they are selling the service of being a midwife or OB we assume that they are knowledgeable of every aspect of childbirth.

(BTW I did not have a breech birth at home. I refused. I went to a dr. and had an external version done in hospital complete with IV in arm and ultrasound machine and an OR room waiting if something
happened. Version went great and after repeated ultrasounds the next couple weeks to verify baby's position I did end up birthing her at home vertex!) So, I guess I would be shunned by the fundamentalist homebirthers--lol

Anne said...

Okay, one word - IDIOT ! Yes, that would describe the majority of them. Oh, duh, let's have a homebirth - because it is "cool and hip" - and - "Well, I have only had 3 c-sections and - of course - nothing will go wrong - for sure....I like TOTALLY won't rupture, NO way." Because (drum -roll, please (idiots) - "Trust Birth, always !"
Liz, they are fools !

asplendidtime said...

Liz, after reading the thread last night, I felt so frustrated. Today I had my own frustrating encounter, again, with someone who is heavily GBS colonised, doesn't want the trouble of an iv, thinks garlic and nutritional things will help... etc, etc, etc...

It's so hard to not feel completely defeated when you supply facts, and the person is so into this magical thinking.... I keep saying "there are no real studies to back that" and "it's not worth your child's life", all they can hear me saying is "I am not one of you, I don't understand because I feel safe with the medical model"... And they disregard everything I say, because they "do their research" oh but they thank me for my concern... :rolleyes: Honestly, why did you ask then about your scary problem??? I think it's just because they want reassurance that their own terribly unsafe choices, are somehow safe, and that little voice inside needs quieting...

Liz, dh said last night to me, that when you put yourself out there and are willing to tell the painful truth; they can't say they didn't know. And maybe when that small voice, sometime whispers, they will remember what you are saying, and then start to think it out.

((((((((((hugs))))))))))) you are doing an amazing, strong and courageous thing! I so admire you and am praying everyday that you will keep on fighting as long as you can.

ccc, your comments really strengthen the weary, thank you for taking the time to write that. :)

~Rebecca

Liz said...

aww Rebecca- *hugs* :)

Michelle said...

Liz, you are so brave to keep posting in that hornets' nest. Please believe me: your experience, and Aquila's life and death, matter deeply. By refusing to be silenced and putting your story out there to those who might be considering homebirth, you are helping women know the REAL risks of homebirth.

I remember being deeply moved and frightened after reading about some homebirth deaths at MDC while I was pregnant with my first child. Expectant mothers are reading and listening. You are honoring Aquila by refusing to let her life and death be ignored.

asplendidtime said...

Liz,

This is my friend Erin:

http://hurtbyhomebirth.blogspot.com/2011/03/thomas-story.html

:( I told you about her.

(((((hugs))))) Praising God for the wonderful courage of Mothers today.
~Rebecca

jacintx said...

"Some lay midwives have always been more expert than others, some better than docs and some worse and some not much better than the grandma next door."

Dear Liz, Can you imagine the acceptability of this statement if you applied it to an M.D.? I'm pretty sure there are licensing standards for OB's that the minimal Dr. needs to meet. I follow your blog through AM and applaud your courage to speak out and make people informed consumers. I had an unexpected partial abruption in Oct. 2009 with my fourth baby - your story has always touched me. xoxo Julie