sweetpea

so she had a permanency hearing today. i am so torn up emotionally over this. we have had her so long and i am starting to fray and unravel the longer we are in limbo. everyone involved with her future is inept. her dad cant string together coherent sentences, much less show up to a visit. the case worker cant get a paternity test scheduled until 6 months into cps's custody. sweetpea's lawyer cant be bothered to show up to her court hearings. her county doesn't use casa workers. for goodness sake- no one even knows how long mom is supposed to be incarcerated!!!! how do they not know that. sweetpea's caseworker has never ever spoken to the mom. never spoken to her!!!
it makes me mad, but mostly it just breaks my heart. i have no idea whats going to happen , but it is clear everything happens slow as molasses.
it is so hard to not become an emotional wreak. at this point, honestly, i don't think that if we lost her we would ever take another placement. i don't think i have enough in me.