So, i have not written in a few days- mostly because i feel like i have nothing to say- but, i convinced myself that since it is 8:10 am and no one but me is awake in the house, i need to take this time and use it!

the fostering front-
We met with the lady from our new agency two nights ago. she is just wonderful, truly a gift from God. i had said i was never going to take another placement from LSSS , but after Aquila died i just wanted the easiest thing. but God had other plans...so LSSS denied me , which forced me into interviewing other agencies. and now i have found a better match for our family BY FAR. i felt so much peace after the first phone conversation with them. i knew this is where we are supposed to be right now. i have also heard through the grapevine that placements are picking up , so i actually have a shot at getting a baby. the thought of have a sweet baby to care for makes my heart sing right now. what a gift that would be!
so, she told us we should have our license by this friday, so pray for us to get the placement that God wants here as soon as possible!

on the healing front-
we have been going to this grief group for parents who have lost children and it has been so healing. there are two other mamas there who lost babies (both around 6 months old).it is so refreshing to have a conversation with someone who understands. although, my heart breaks for them. this is the club no one wants to join, and no one wants more members to be added, but we still welcome them with open arms- IYKWIM
i also met one of tristan's friend's mother who recently lost a child to stillbirth. again it was the feeling of relief that i could talk to someone who gets it. i don't have to feel like a burden, or a downer. i know it doesn't bother these mamas, because i know i am hungry to hear their stories too.

on the art front-
my newest media has been polymer clay. i have been making babies, which is so engrossing and hands on, i love it. here is one of my babies (i am slowly getting better)