how are you doing?
-well that answer varies minute to minute. but for the most part i would say i am 'struck down, but not destroyed'
what can i do to help?
- i wish i knew the answer to that one!
How are the kids doing?
- they are taking it . Lucca is very angry. Sebastian has nightmares, and no longer makes it through the night in his own bed. Ruby cries all night, waking up repeatedly to throw her binkie out of her crib and demand we wake up , retrieve it and pat her back. Kiryn and Tristan don't talk about it. they just fight all the time. We are setting up counseling for them and Lucca.
i am so sorry
-me too
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4 comments:
I began to answer questions of how we were doing in terms of weather. Today might be partly sunny, but there was a great chance of seemingly never ending thunderstorms just around the corner. My desire for help was sporadic. Sometimes I wanted it, sometimes I just wanted to be left alone.
There was a day that I just decided that nothing anyone could say or do was going to help me. The only thing that helped me was time and God's grace. My prayers in the early days of grief consisted of one word, "Help." When I got a little stronger, they grew to "Help, me."
But I certainly learned the truth of the verse that says that He is a very present help in the time of trouble because no matter how often or pitiable my mournful cry was. He came, in some form or another, and offered me His hand to lean on, even if only one moment at a time.
I'm praying for your journey.
Liz,
I found via Austin Mamas. I wanted to thank you for sharing the pictures of Aquilla. So beautiful. I feel honored that you shared her images with us.
I know there is nothing anyone can say or do that will take your pain away. Just know my family is thinking you.
Love,
Holly
(Mom to Ruby Hope www.rubyhope.com)
No words, mama. Just hear to listen and learn and keep your family in my thoughts.
sometimes, on my worst days, i am really visceral.
"How are you doing?"
"My kid's dead. I'm infertile now... You?"
Probably not the kindest way to approach it, but sometimes the platitudes and questions become really draining. And sometimes there is so much judgement in the tone in which they are asked. I am so sorry to learn about the loss of your sweet Aquila. What a beautiful girl. I won't pretend to say I know how it feels to have a child born still, but I do know how difficult and dark the early months of my own grief were, and it pains me to see another mother in that place. I won't ask how you are doing, just know that I, and so many others, understand.
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